For all the copy editors and grammarians – stick to the cause and if anyone calls you picky, remember that some people out there, whether indirectly or not, appreciate what you do. Some people don't think about what they write anymore and the email has made writing almost as easy as talking. The following things annoyed me:
Bonjour M. Knight, or should I say bonsoir, I am writing to[...]
Yes you should say bonsoir, so go back, delete “bonjour”, replace it with “bonsoir” and continue writing. This isn't dialogue; you have the chance to correct your mistake, use it.
Oi, [Werner]. How the hell are you?
This is all she wrote. It left me with no return of serve - she gave me no information about herself and asked for no specific news about me. She could have sent the same thing to anyone, or I could have popped into her train of thought briefly, so she banged this out and got on with her day. “How are you?” is a conversation opener but far from a complete contribution in written form. I'm left with the annoying task of thinking of something to say – I have to make all the effort for something I didn't start.
Am not back in Baerlin until the 2nd but if you need any help with carrying shit then let me know!
Hugs, A
It's not necessary for Andy to use the exclamation mark; he must have had time to do a quick spell check; and either he can't be arsed to write his own name out fully, or thinks he's worthy of abbreviation status like FDR, JS Bach, AA Milne or OJ Simpson.
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3 comments:
Brother K-night, I'm a man of loose morals and withering convictions so I'm enjoying the rules. I implemented Paul's coffee discipline rule and think it's great. It's kind of related to QuarkXpress' Dad's commandment, which is essential.
I'm sure you have a rule against requests but do you know of any rules around adultery aside from the big one Moses set down. I've been pondering this one lately. I've read a lot of novels by randy Jewish authors like Bellow and Roth. They seem to assume adultery in a long marriage is a given. I'm sort of down with that but reckon I would do violence to any significant other of mine if she strayed.
Ah yes and here's a rule which could be useful: NEVER use sms text message to communicate anything of any importance.
Dkindyo aka DanGerous aka Steuart's bother
The coffee rule is good, yes. It prevents the drinking thereof from becoming ritualistic and thus less enjoyable. A Swiss lady once caught me eating an apple and drinking coffee - a stupid combination when I look back. She told me that the coffee would kill all the vitamins I takes in for the next hour. It made me look at the black stuff differently.
As for the wife beatings, Chris Rock said something like "I'd never hit a woman, but I'd shake the shit out of her". I think violence is a state of mind best avoided. It leaves a nasty mental scar on the perpetrator.
Your text-message rule is a good one. "An SMS is not an SOS" could be the name of a rival blog, or one that would join with this and others to form a modern-day bible for pensive men - The Book of Rules.
Until last December I would slug a tall glass of orange schaft first thing in the morning, followed by a coffee chaser. Followed again by a few hours of intestinal tumult. Lunacy!
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