Dedicated to those that told me to blog again - Quarkus, Jay-D, El Bean and The Short Age.Yesteryear, Facebook was about adding friends you hadn't spoken to in years, having a short message rally and then keeping them as a friend despite never speaking to them again. But times are a rearrangin', and here's what you need to do to keep up.
Out with the old and in with the selected new: it's time to delete some of those old primary-school friends that you will never speak to again. No need for them to see photos of you getting mashed at a festival on 6 different types of drugs. Try deleting 20 friends, then delete 20 more. And don't add people willy-silly nilly. You never know when some goofoid will realise that you live in Berlin and they always wanted to go there and they want to see you and you never get any peace for the whole summer. In fact, delete info on where you live so this doesn't happen anymore.
Utterly incriminating photos of your friends smoking joints or worse should not be put online; the internet never forgets.
Also, tag moderately. Choose a complementing photo. Tagging is also important as it allows friends of tagged people to see the photos, too.
Resist using exlamation marks in messages, despite what some say about a message coming across as serious when it's only meant to be banter. People should know you well enough to tell if you are joking or not - if they don't, remove them.
Send emails to individuals using proper email accounts and not on Facebook. This saves clicks, i.e. reading the message in your regular email account and then having to click on a link in order to reply to the message on Facebook. Threads, however, are great on Facebook
Everytime you write an update it will appear on all of your friends' startpage. So don't write utterly boring yesterday's wank-rag about how hungover you are, or how much you're lookin 4ward2 da wkend lol. Do post stuff like this because it's good and we should encourage people to create more - thank you all:
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7 comments:
Yeah, good advice,I do agree with most of it.
Not sure about exclamation marks (and smileys and the like) though. Written language as opposed to spoken language does lose content, because of the lack of intonation, mimics, gestures etc. We make up for it by using punctuation and emoticons, to avoid misunderstandings. In the beginning I resisted using them as well, got me into unnecassary trouble a couple of times, so I turned pro in the end :)
As for status updates, I might be guilty of doing what you outlined above to some extent. Not sure how many people are excited by the fact that I found two hearts in my tights today. If it does get too annoying, you can still set your setting to "hide" for friends who are too mitteilungsbedürftig.
And now, big up for HÜHNERHAUS
BS
Thank you, BS. How kind of you to leave a comment! :) (The exclamation mark and smiley are required, otherwise you wouldn't know that I was thankful or pleased. Lol. (This lol is required to take the sting out of my arsey response.))
Feel free to punish me later in ze bedroom of punishment!
Looking forward to it, though I suspect before I can get the whip out, I'll be beaten up with regards to that magical number 182...
Forgot to mention something. Punctuation marks are used differently in different languages. Apparently the exclamation mark does cause a lot less distress to German than to English readers. On the other hand, English sentences with a full stop at the end where Germans would put an exclamation mark look really odd to the German eye.
So please do allow for interferences from 1st/2nd languages and don't punish those handicapped non-native speakers out of there wits.
BS
Have also written status saying "I am hungover." I just think combination of being hungover 6 general low standards of status updates encourages this behaviour. Cheesepie is right though we gotta watch out. I am blatantly addicted to FB, and it just makes me feel miserable, actually, and half the videos ppl post make me feel a bit sad and useless (NOT Hühn one though)
Yeah Eng exclamation marks we are grinning desperately, Germans are just shouting beleidigtly a bit, verstehst du!
Think I need to stop writing so many negative things, though. There's really not that much wrong with writing "am hungover lol!" or what ever poeple write. It only becomes wrong when pedantic shits like me make a point of it, always focussing on the negative like Nick Hancock presenting They Think it's All Over or Room 101. As Anton Ego says at the end of Ratatouille, "In many ways, the work of a critic is easy. We risk very little, yet enjoy a position over those who offer up their work and their selves to our judgment. We thrive on negative criticism, which is fun to write and to read. But the bitter truth we critics must face, is that in the grand scheme of things, the average piece of junk is probably more meaningful than our criticism designating it so."
Next post will be full of positive dos and devoid of don'ts.
Firstly, great to have you back brother. Equally, that vid is quality and makes me feel like jacking it all in to live the life in Berlin. But i will pull my tampon out to say the following; one aspect of grammar that cannot be overlooked is as to how alluring it can be. A competent use of grammar can suggest a level of intelligence which one would not even be able to discern from an hour's worth of conversation. Commas are my favourite. If i'm 'facebooking' a girl and she is throwing commas in all the correct places then she is halfway there. I go weak at the knees. Conversely, if a judy is using bad grammar, she has to be stunning for the axe not to fall. It is quite clear to the reader when poor grammar results from laziness and speed of thought - that, to an extent, is forgiveable. But when bad grammar shares a message with capital letters, apostrophes, fully spelt words and the like, then you should prepare yourself for a beatdown. Let this be a lesson to all you birkenhead girls - sort your grammar out you illiterate idiots.
Yeah lad. Their are to many idiots in you're neck of the woods. No but serusly, if I see some status update from a former schoolmate and it's full of mistakes I always assume that they never went on to do higher education. Poor bastards, not really their fault. Probably best just to avoid them so they don't feel too inferior.
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