For my brother, who runs a strict but fair and logical library.
Borrowing and lending, when conducted properly, can improve your quality of life. But when done incorrectly, sharing can cause rifts in a relationship. And while each borrow/lend situation should be treated individually, there are some general rules you should follow:
The lender
Tell the borrower when you want the item back. This is not just in your interest but in theirs also. I recommend:
Book - up to six months if the lender has already read it.
DVD/video - one week unless box set, for which up to three months if the lender has already seen it.
CD/cassette/record - up to one month. If the lender hasn't listened to it yet he shouldn't be lending it or even owning the bastard.
Clothes - one week. This gives the borrower enough time to fit the item into one of his weekly wash cycles.
Porn - should be restricted to internal house/flat-sharing overnight-rental conditions. Otherwise the return of the item can take months, if ever.
The borrower
The borrower should not need the lender to remind him to return the borrowed item.
If the borrower damages the lender's lend he must replace the item without questioning whether he should or not. Damage includes:
A book ruined by water, fire, dirt or tearing.
A warped or chewed-up tape or video.
A CD or DVD with a noticeable skip in any scene or track.
Torn, burnt or stained clothing.
Soiled porn.
Look at this beautiful exchange, in which the lender of a book is given the chance to review the extend of its damage and decide if the borrower should replace the book or not.
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5 comments:
Good post. What I'd be interested to read is an extension of the rules dealing with someone you are presently or were previously involved with. Is one to conclude that, when lending a partner an item, one is abandoning any firm guarantee of seeing the item again?
It is also usually the case that after a break-up one has no desire to go round to a former paramour's house to reclaim lost objects. But what if something important was among them?
I would say that if the relationship ended on a rather sour, shrill note, then the lender should give up on seeing the item again. Unless it's important.
No. Insist on getting it back.
Also, there are rules about how many books/DVDs/CDs you should be expected to lend to one person at any one time. Any more than 4 and you're taking the piss.
Ben is unusually strong-willed in this scene. Solomonesque? Practically Stalinesque, for Ben. He doesn't even look at the lender or at the lender's advocate, does he? And, in terms of body language, he hands the book back, connoting "Take it back and get me a new one; this one is no longer good enough, you rodent," before the scene even ends.
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